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Ten years ago today……

Ten years… a whole decade… since my first book baby, Stronger Within was published for Kindle. (The paperback edition followed a few weeks later)

It feels truly surreal that ten years have passed since that day.

I chose the date carefully. (I’m a bit weird about dates) The 15th April would have been my Wee Gran’s birthday. It was also the date that The Big Green Gummi Bear proposed to me. It was a date that felt as if it augured well.

In all honesty, I was absolutely petrified about self-publishing my first-born book baby. Was I about to make myself a laughingstock? What if no one bought it? What if everyone who did then hated it? What if they all thought it was rubbish? What if….

Looking back, it took me more personal courage than I knew I had to release that book, but I also knew that by taking the plunge that I was making my lifelong dream come true.

Ever since I had been a little girl, I’d dreamed of being an author one day and seeing my name on the cover of a book. I made that dream come true.

Stronger Within’s story began almost two years earlier on 8 May 2013 when I bought a notebook and pen on the way home from work then after dinner that evening, sat down on my front doorstep in the early evening sunshine and began to write. As I wrote page after page over the coming weeks and months, I had no idea that this story that I was writing was destined to become my first book.

One of my biggest fears, one that I have worked hard to conquer, is a crippling fear of letting people read what I write. It’s a terrible fear for an author to have! It was months before I told anyone about what I was attempting to do. Thanks to the belief that a few close friends had in me, I was persuaded to type the story up and share it with them. They loved it! Even the friend who on the face of things should have hated it, loved it. Their love and faith in my storytelling gave me the push I needed to venture into the world of self-publishing. It was a steep learning curve!

If you’d said to me on 15 April 2015 that ten years down the line, I’d have seven novels and a poetry anthology for sale worldwide via Amazon and that they’d all have multiple glowing reviews, I would never have believed you. I’d have thought you were insane to even think I could achieve that. Seven novels? Me? Never….

Yet here we are and that’s exactly what happened. My eighth novel is in the pipeline too. It still feels completely surreal…I am a published author who has sold books in several countries around the world!

Over the years people have asked me how I do it. I’ve been asked countless times about how I find the time to do it. I’ve been asked why I do it.

The how is that I sit down somewhere, whether that’s at my desk, or the picnic table or the doorstep with a notebook and a pen and I write the story one word after another.

The time I carve out to do something that I am passionate about. If you care enough about something you will always find time in your day to do it. Some days it’s a few hours and on others it’s a few minutes.

The why is a bit more complex to answer but the short version is that it gives me somewhere to escape to.

Writing to me is like oxygen. I can’t imagine a day without it in one form or other.

I’ve always said that if it ever begins to feel like work then that’s the day that I put the lid back on my pen, close over my notebook and put them down.

If you’ve spared some of your hard-earned pennies to purchase one of my books, I thank you.

If you’ve read it and then taken the time to leave me a review online, I thank you.

If you haven’t read any of them yet, then I’d encourage you to give one a try. You never know, you might enjoy it. Lots of other people have so far.

For me the end goal here isn’t to seek fame and fortune. (Ok a little bit of a fortune would be nice, I’ll not lie.) There are very few indie-authors who earn enough from their books to make a living. Without a word of a lie, at the time of writing this, my estimated royalties for the month are £1.56/$2.00 – not even enough to buy a cup of coffee. I write for the love of telling the story and if by telling that story I evoke an emotional reaction in my reader whether it be laughter or tears then my job is done.

They say everyone has a book in them so if you fancy finding the book in you, buy a notebook and a pen, find a sunny spot, sit down and begin to write. You never know where that dream will take you.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you to each and every one of you who has supported my creative journey over the last ten years, especially to my Infamous Five.  I couldn’t do it without your love and support and belief in me.

Love n hugs

Coral

PS If you’ve not checked out any of my book babies yet, here’s the links-

Silver Lake series

Amazon.com links –

Stronger Within – https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00VXDSC1M  FREE TO DOWNLOAD TODAY

Impossible Depths – https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01C0GS30K

Bonded Souls – https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06XSQHG71

Shattered Hearts – https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07ZY8ZSDM

Long Shadows – https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08RR1FGLG

Amazon.co.uk links  –

Stronger Within – https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00VXDSC1M  FREE TO DOWNLOAD TODAY

Impossible Depths – https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B01C0GS30K

Bonded Souls – https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B06XSQHG71

Shattered Hearts – https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07ZY8ZSDM

Long Shadows – https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B08RR1FGLG

Riley

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0B9SWP6K3

https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B0B9SWP6K3

Ellen

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FYHKR44

http s://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07FYHKR44

Beginnings – poetry anthology

Beginnings – a collection of poems – Kindle edition by McCallum, Coral. Literature & Fiction Kindle eBooks @ Amazon.com.

Beginnings – a collection of poems eBook : McCallum, Coral: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store

A Midnight Musical Moment (flash fiction)

It was late, almost midnight, and the house was quiet…too quiet. All around her the kitchen lay in chaos after the earlier visit from her kids and their partners. It had been wonderful to have everyone over for dinner, but it was nice to wave them off at the front door too and have the house to herself again.

“Alexa, play my soundtrack,” she instructed as she began to load the dishwasher.

The first song that the “sometimes-not-so-smart” speaker began to play stirred up emotional ghosts from the past.

“Skip,” she stated sharply as she added the cutlery to the basket in the dishwasher.

Soon the kitchen was filled with music. She sang quietly and tunelessly to herself while she worked, content to lose herself in the songs. Music had always been her safe place, her sanctuary, and her playlist held so many precious memories for her.

Still singing, she filled the sink with hot soapy water and began to wash the wine glasses, stacking them carefully on the draining rack. The speaker began to play a song she hadn’t heard for a long, long time. It always reminded her of him. It was the song that had been playing the only time that they had danced together, slightly drunkenly, at a mutual friend’s wedding. That dance was one of her most precious memories of him. They’d trodden on each other’s toes repeatedly as they’d slowly made their way round the dancefloor that night.

Behind her, something in the air stirred. A familiar scent wafted by. She felt hands at her waist, pulling her round and into the all too familiar embrace of her past. Allowing herself to be held, she the arms around her encouraging her to sway in time to the music. Swept up in the moment, she danced slowly round the kitchen, savouring the seconds right through to the dying notes of the song.

From his perch on the breakfast bar, her cat watched the scene, wondering who this man was that was dancing in the kitchen at midnight with his mistress.

(credits to the owner of the image The Heart Speaks via Facebook)

Pythagoras – an acrostic poem for our beautiful boy

Petite white paws with pink beans

You stole my baby boy’s heart a long time ago

Taking up too much space in his bed at night

Hunter extraordinaire in your day

Agile and strong

Ginger fur softening as the years flew by

Over the roof and in through the window you’d go

Reluctantly accepting my love in time

A big softie underneath it all

Sleep easy, beautiful boy

March 2009 – 14 March 2005

Five years ago today…..

23 March 2020…the day the UK entered its first Covid 19 Lockdown.

How on earth is that five years ago already?

It all seems surreal…

I remember sitting having a coffee in the office canteen with a friend three days before the announcement. We pondered if this virus would come to anything and if we were told that we had to work from home, how long would that last. Little did we realise…

Five years down the line and we’ve not sat together in the office canteen with a coffee since.

That first lockdown for me marks the start of the world changing forever. I appreciate that in my family’s case our lockdown suffered a dark cruel twist of fate when The Big Green Gummi Bear received a terminal cancer diagnosis in September 2020. In so many ways we lived in semi-lockdown conditions for three years.

In years to come, when our children’s children are in school, they’ll come home and ask us, “What did you do during the Covid 19 Lockdowns?” It’ll become one of those questions like “where were you when 9/11 happened?” and “where were you when Kennedy was shot?”

Will our grandchildren really believe that overnight all schools and offices and non-essential shops closed, that you were only allowed out for an hour a day, that the supermarket shelves were half empty and that you had to queue to be allowed into the store to follow a one-way system marked out on the floor? (I still recall being yelled at by a member of our local supermarket staff for going the wrong way down an aisle only to witness her cooing over a customer’s baby in a pram a few moments later and not obeying the 2m social distancing rule….) Will our grandchildren believe that folk were stockpiling toilet rolls and that you couldn’t get any in the shops for love nor money? Will they believe that for months on end people would stand on their doorsteps at 8pm on a Thursday to clap in support of the NHS workers? Will they be able to comprehend having to wear a mask in shops/schools/offices and on public transport?  Will they even be able to comprehend not being able to see our loved ones for weeks on end and then when we could mix socially again you had to stay 2m apart and only meet up outdoors? Will they believe that everyone’s general knowledge dramatically improved as everyone was keeping morale up by doing quizzes on Zoom or Teams?

How do you explain the covid testing rituals we all went through to prove that you didn’t have the virus? Or how to describe the initial panic when the test was actually positive? Would “it” kill me?

I could go on, but you get the gist…. after all you lived through it and have your own memories of the challenges lockdown brought but does it really truly feel like it was five years ago?

It all seems surreal.

To Sign Or Not To Sign (poetic dilemma)

Dilemma

How to sign?

Signing autographs feels alien

Full name?

First initial and second name?

Signing autographs feels alien

First name and a kiss?

Decision made.

A short poem inspired by the real life dilemma I faced ahead of my recent book signing in aid of Ardgowan Hospice.

The Measly Jar of Motivation – Breakfast time!

The Measly Jar of Motivation has thrown out two phrases that scream “Breakfast!”

Breakfast is a meal I’ve had a difficult relationship with over the years. I’m not great at eating first thing in the morning. A big, cooked breakfast would be totally wasted on me.

Those followers of this blog who know me personally might be somewhat surprised that hot coffee is not the first thing I need every morning. At a push, I can make it to lunchtime without my caffeine hit but I cannot function without my orange juice. It’s a vital component of my morning routine. I love the taste of oranges although I would never sit and actually peel and eat an orange. I hate finding “bits” in my OJ so its smooth/pulp free all the way for me.

After OJ then comes hot coffee – hot, strong and black. I can’t stand cold or even cool coffee. I like my Americano piping hot.

As for food… well, that’s either a toasted cinnamon raisin bagel or hot buttered toast. If I’m in the office, it’s a cereal bar.

On a Sunday, I like to have a more leisurely start to the day and treat myself to some crispy pancetta with my cinnamon raisin bagel and my coffee. We all have our weaknesses…

Last summer, when I returned to visit Rehoboth Beach, I became a regular at a local diner. I also became a creature of habit despite their extensive breakfast menu- OJ, coffee and a short stack of pancakes. Delicious! I can’t wait to go back this summer for more of the same.

So, what’s your breakfast guilty pleasure?

The Measly Jar of Motivation – Snowfall

Most days I walk by the house I grew up in…well, grew up in from the age of nine to seventeen. I look fondly at its steep driveway and smile.

I have many memories associated with that driveway by my favourites are of playing on it in winter in the snow. As an adult, I hate snow. I hate being cold. But as a child, that driveway was the best place for sledging and for sliding.

After one memorable snowfall, I recall playing for hours with my childhood friend. I didn’t own a sledge, but she did. The best I had was an old metal tea tray that I waxed with a candle to make it run faster.

We spent ages that day smoothing out our “run” down the driveway. I should explain that at this point in time, under the several inches of snow, the driveway itself was unsurfaced. Blaze had been spread over it to provide a surface for future tarmac and at the bottom there was still a pile of several tons of blaze. With a bit of work and some snow packing, it made the perfect ramp at the bottom of our “run”

With clumps of ice clinging to our woolly gloves and filling our wellie boots, we spent hours sledging on the driveway, getting closer and closer to becoming airborne off the top of that ramp.

If memory serves me right, my friend managed it at least once on her sledge before we realised it was better fun sliding down on the metal tray as it went faster.

The closest to the luge as I’ll ever get!

Precious childhood memories that were rewarded at the end of the day with red icy cold fingers wrapped round a mug of hot chocolate.

Happy carefree days….

Shavasana (poem)

In meditative repose

I lie in shavasana, corpse pose.

Breathing quietly in and out through my nose.

Did I feed the cat?

Should I put on the washing before work?

Need to remember to call the dentist.

Oh.. and I need to add milk to the Tesco list.

And so my mind whirs on…

No quiet thoughts to be found

I focus on my breathing…in  and out…

Seeking the stillness of the pose.

Need to remember to post that birthday card.

And I’ve to call the garage about the car.

Wonder what time my first meeting is today?

And so my mind whirs on

In meditative repose.

photo sourced via Google- credits to the owner